For mother’s day month, we wanted to give you some insights and tips for strengthening your mamá and hija connection, whether you already have a beautiful and healthy relationship or you're trying to repair a strained one, the following reminders will get you closer to la reina de la casa… Tu mamá!
BEHIND EVERY GREAT CHILD IS A MOM WHO IS PRETTY SURE SHE’S SCREWING IT ALL UP - JODI PICOULT
Todas sabemos que mother-daughter relationships are one of the most complex, unique and special bonds that exist. According to science, there’s a reason for that — and it comes down to how our brains process emotion. Y si tu mamá es latina, most likely she’s already your number one ally when it comes to all-things-emotions, or as we like to say in spanish una “alcahueta”.
I can personally say that I am proud and feel blessed for the relationship I have built with my mother, Belinda. She not only gave me life, she’s also one of my best friends, my confidant, accomplice, mi mano derecha, and most importantly, someone I laugh with. Es medio pelionera, but I love that about her. I can’t really blame her for having sass, she can’t help it, my mom’s from Mazatlán, Sinaloa!
The amount of sass she has, is equal to the love she poured into her role as mother and the never ending dedication to her family. A beautiful memory I have of my childhood living in Tijuana is how my mom would get us ready for school, picked us up, then cooked us delicious three course meals with agua fresca and desert. On top of that she would drive us around to extra-curricular activities, until finally dinnertime and tucking us into bed.
That was my mother’s day to day, and now I understand how privileged I am for having her by my side during the most important, crucial years of my upbringing.
5 TIPS FOR BUILDING A BETTER CONNECTION WITH YOUR MOM
These are some of the things I do as a daughter that helps maintain a good relationship with my mom. While I know everyone is different and what works for some may be a little more challenging for others, the main thing to keep in mind is empathy and trust. Todo con amor, y Con Ovarios.
- Understand HER perspective: Latina moms can be stubborn, but so can we. It's important for us as daughters to understand and respect her point of view and the reason behind her actions. The most famous come back from any Latina mom is “Es por tu bien”. And in their eyes, it really is. So next time, before you talk to her, ask yourself why she said what she said. Take a moment to consider how your mom is feeling or thinking and most likely, this will make your conversation easier.
- Communicate effectively: Any time I speak to my mom, I keep in mind several things, like the space and time she grew up in. I can’t expect her to see the world like I do as first generation, even though my mom es muy cool. I communicate in a way that is respectful, compassionate and understanding, even when discussing difficult or sensitive topics.
- Hang out with her: As adults, we may value our time with our moms more because we have gained a greater appreciation for the sacrifices and hard work that they have made for us throughout their lives. Taking her out de paseo or finding common interests not only will help build a stronger bond and understanding between the two of you, but it will make your mamacita feel special that you are invested in her passions. Spending quality time with mamá is a beautiful opportunity to give back to her and to begin seeing her as an individual, and not just a mom.
- Be patient and forgiving: Ninguna de nuestras mamas llegó a este mundo con un manual on how to be the perfect mother. And even though we may see our mamacitas as super women, we must remember they are human beings who make mistakes, and most importantly, have their own struggles, just like everyone else. By practicing forgiveness and understanding, we can build a stronger and more resilient bond.
- Remember, WE are the sole creators of our relationships: While we cannot control everything that happens in our relationships, we do have the choice over the kind of energy we bring to our interactions. The way we communicate, show up, and respond to our mothers, can have a significant impact on the quality and depth of our relationship. If we approach the matter with kindness, empathy, and respect, we are more likely to build strong, positive connections with our mothers.
WE CELEBRATE EL DÍA DE LAS MADRES PROUDLY
El Día de las Madres is a special occasion to celebrate the ultimate NYTAQ of the house, our mother, yet, it can also serve as a reset button to strengthen our mother-daughter relationships.
The important thing is to reflect on the unconditional love and support they have given us and by following these simple tips, you can deepen the connection that will last a lifetime.